Just writing

I’ve always wanted to be a writer. A good writer. Partly because I love words and the way they can move both writer and reader of all types. But partly if I’m honest ( the new me now) because when well done, it seems it can be portable.

I want to write because I want to hope that I’m half good at it. I want to write because I feel safer behind my words. But in the same breath I don’t think I’m that good at it. Or at best good enough to do the dream.

I don’t remember the small things of my life, my real life. I promise myself I will, but I don’t. I also don’t really remember the details of good enough stuff I read.

I’m listening to Geraldine Brookes giving the first of her four Boyer lectures. It is broadly speaking on the environment and having a sense of place. I usually get turned off by environmental activism as much of it seems to be anti people, anti relationship and anti balance and full of guilt mungering and but you must know generalizations

I like the way she put her acknowledgement of country neatly within the context of her lecture; where it made sense and resonated with the rest of the points she was making. I believe her. I join her in that sentiment wholeheartedly as opposed to watching it sit there like a sixth digit.

I now at the end of that lecture want to go and check that the wheelchair charger that keeps me disabled and handicapped from having any sort of real wilderness experience is off and run the handwashing load that is due as early as possible to make use the natural sunlight to dry things in air.

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Weekend and quasi-book review

The ChildrenThe Children by Charlotte Wood

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

View all my reviews

Saturday was a nice start to the Labor Day long weekend. A lowish tech day, but I was pleased to discover that it wasn’t hard to be low-tech.

I read “The Children” by Australia author Charlotte Wood. I had read The Submerged Cathedral when it first came out a few years ago, and liked it and although the back cover indicated that “The Children” was going to be a sad read, I picked it up in a local bookshop after lamenting my lack of fiction reading and reading in general.Of paper books at any rate!

The premise of the book is roughly thus:adult children who; let’s just say have their differences, gather from the four corners in the small country town of their upbringing round the bedside  of ageing father who is suddenly in a coma and try to deal with stuff, including, of course family politics and a local stalker!

I read all 300 ish pages in the space of say 6 hours. I certainly didn’t read it non-stop but in two or three longish stints. It was part of my vaguely successful pre-birthday retreat thing. As it has since emerged I need whatever respite I was given.

It was a good read – insightful without being too profound so that I didn’t feel taught but more “included”. I laughed and sighed as if I was part of the family. The dying man was there but as a facilitator and the use of foreground and shadow settings made it all more ok

 

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Moments with Socrates — making choices

My recent readings having included re-reading Socrates’ Apology (as reported we think by Plato).

A passage has struck me: — apologies for the gendered language

 

“You are mistaken, my friend, if you think that a man who is worth anything ought to spend his time weighing up the prospects of life and death. He has only one thing to consider in performing any action; that is, whether he is acting rightly or wrongly, like a good man or a bad one” 27B-28C

 

 

 

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I haven’t forgotten

Just had a busy few weeks with university exams and other workish or life-ish management.

And with reading Pride and Prejudice yet again. This time another spin-off. This time a good
series told from Darcy’s point of view by an American author, Pamela Aiden. Reviews to follow.

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four deviant behaviours in one day

I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately, on criminological/psychological/sociological issues. I find myself like I did when I first went to uni years ago suddenly wondering how deviant I am. It is apparently a well recognised phenomena, self diagnosis based on reading of the characteristics of deviant behaviour, or mental health issues.

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tuesday tiny: not a dark mark

I’m back studying again for all sorts of reasons and yet none at all.

I’m doing it online, but through a proper university here. I’m excited.

 

Especially when I get a mark of 93% on my first online exam this year.

And I know what I’m going to do for the essays due in the next two weeks.

Feel good about it.

 

 

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On the selling of books

I’ve been following It’s All Too Much
by Peter Walsh an Australian turned American declutter expert. After two read-throughs of the book, I’ve been slowly getting my head around throwing things out. I’m heartily sick of being unable to find things and this has actually been a good remedy, even if I haven’t found any of the exact things on my list. I’ve found 3 DVD’s i loved and was missing as well as two books that I had missed. No sign of the missing key or my winter wardrobe. But still.

It’s been a good practise to get into. Books I fear will be my Achilles heel. Although I have recently gone through my bookcase and have a garbage bag full of books that are not representative of me, or that I can’t bring myself to read again. I fear that I have a long way to go. I have listed 2 today on eBay, with more to come.

With a pile of books that I must get through reading, including two largely untouched library books I must get to, now is not the time to indulge in rereading or in what I call “re-try” reading. I was well behaved putting these books in the eBay pile, but as I looked through them to write up the listing., I had pangs of regret.

“maybe I should reread this one”
“I didn’t give this one a fair shot.”

“Did I get as much use out of this one as I could”

Oh if only I had infinite time time to read.

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if ….

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build’em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

Or daughter I trust.

I love this one — and I needed it right now.

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nice to rest and read

With the heatwave continuing and my writing window in direct sunlight, I haven’t been writing. It has been a mentally and physically trying couple of days. Thankfully mostly inside under air conditioning (something sadly lacking here at the moment).

Late on Friday night under the one ceiling fan, but still unable to sleep, I discovered I had audio book credits so went on a shopping spree from my bed. I have grown to really love books on tape as my grandmother would have called them. Less hassle somehow.

I bought The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin, whose blog I’ve been following. Like her, I’m not particularly unhappy in the day to day. But for various reasons I like her approach of incremental improvements or focus areas for a month at a time. I’ve “read” up to May. Will rest it a few days till I get a few things done.

I bought Stein on Writing; a book much admired by writers and writing coaches. I don’t consider myself a writer, but my library would declare a love of the craft. Haven’t started it yet.

Any book on the craft of writing declares that one must read veraciously. I don’t. Not fiction at least. These days I tend to scan or study them for data or growth or information.

I stopped that.

When I was living in the UK a few years ago I discovered Alexander McCall-Smith; he of the No. 1 Detective Agency, which seemed to be having a flush of popularity when I was there. Or perhaps it was just more apparent because I was in Scotland at the time and my mother liked that series given she had travelled in Africa where it was set.

I have tended to prefer one of his other series The Sunday Philosophers Club based on a fictional philosopher in her early 40′s with a sharp mind, an over-zealous curiosity and a good memory for all her reading history. I bought two in that series, taking me back to pleasant memories of the time there.

I finished the first of those in two readings. It was nice to read fiction again

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